So I have now officially been married for 6+ months. And during these 6 months I have learned many things about Chris and about marriage and using this profound knowledge I have made a simplified list of 6 things you need to know to survive your first six months of marriage. Well I made 3 rules and Chris made 3 rules.
Alyssa’s 3 Rules
1. Always sleep with background noise. A loud fan is our method of choice. If one of you is a light sleeper and one of you has some snoring (he calls it breathing, I call it snoring) problems, background noise is key. Always remember sleep is crucial to living a happy life.
2. Make Dinner Together. This goes off the concept of limiting phone time and making quality time a priority. Chris is gone so often during the week for work that on weeknights we both have our own separate routines. So when he is around I find myself distracted by social media, because that is my habit to keep me occupied while he is away. So now we have phone time-outs on evenings when we are both at home, and we always make dinner together. We use this time to talk about our days, laugh, sing, dance, clean (if you’re Chris) and do a little bit of cooking. This uninterrupted time has quickly turned into one of my favorite parts of the day.
3. Pray ALL The Time. Living together with someone new and expecting your lives to seamlessly flow together is not going to happen. Now throw in stress from school and tons of traveling for work and you have a hot mix of emotions (90% of them mine) and the only way to get through it is to turn to God and constantly pray. I pray for Chris all the time and I pray for me to a better, more selfless wife. Sure we have our moments, we are humans, but with God on our side it’s easier to not sweat the small stuff.
Chris’s 3 Rules
*Written by Chris*
1. Be okay with clutter. Oh man is that a tough one for me to handle. It’s really not that I’m a super clean person, but I definitely like things neat and organized. So when I’m using something, once I’m done, I put it back right away or clean up. Whereas Alyssa tends to leave a lot of stuff on the floor, such as clothes, school work, and BOBBY PINS (the worst). This just builds up long enough until a mass clean session is necessary. I still struggle with this one, but I’m learning to accept things being a little more messy. Although, in my opinion, she could totally accept things being a little more organized 🙂
2. Consult the wife when grocery shopping. So once upon a time, I’m all like I’m going to be nice and go grocery shopping for us. I’ve never been a big fan of grocery shopping (which I believe stems from going grocery shopping with my dad and my grandpa. They know EVERYBODY and grocery shopping takes 2 hours every time because they’ve always got to visit. Small town problems). Well, I didn’t appropriately shop for all the correct items this one fateful day. My lovely wife was not too pleased. But I also feel like she was being especially hard on me because of this whole dietitian/nutritionist/gluten-free thing she has going on. Nonetheless, from that point on, I consult the wifey during grocery shopping excursions…but I can still get away with a package of Oreos now and then.
3. Compromise! All in all, I would say my lists really comes down to compromising on many things. Whether it be what workout we’re doing for the day, what activity we want to do for the day, or being okay with clutter (shiver). Really that list can go on and on. But as for one recent example, football season is coming up (woo!!!!!). Which also means fall is approaching. Alyssa and I just had a discussion that for each sporting event attended, we must also go to an apple orchard. Alyssa loves her apples, and I love my football games. Of course, doing these things is way better together (unless it’s grocery shopping), but being able to compromise on things is extremely important.
So there you have it, marriage advice from the newly weds! If you are recently married or a veteran I would love to hear some of your secrets for marriage!
~Alyssa & Chris